Monday 7 March 2016

Just another fearer!

It's strange how they think I play well with the colours. I am one of those who hates the very essence of the colours that surround. This is not because I don't like them, this is simply because it reveals a lot more than what I want to see and believe. Colours are that ugly medium which pretend to beautify things but end up revealing your dark side to yourself. It is strange how colours take that liberty of showing my unwept tears while I have been working hard on smiling all day.
I am not an artist, I will never be one. It's just strange that I fear two things in the universe i.e. MIRROR and COLOUR.
Being one of those who would never want to accept things the way they are, I feel it's quite obvious to fear the mirror. At times I feel it's the combination of mirror and colour which has made all of us so helpless.
In an era in which we pretend to live while all we do is breathe and function like a machine; it is this brutal colour which wants to break the monotony and probably wants you to feel the good, the bad and the ugly. The mirror, in front of which you stand tall everyday while combing your hair, tucking in your shirt etc only to help yourself accept that you look presentable for the world that doesn't even give a damn about your existence. How many times have you pretended to ignore the dark circles under your eyes or the wrinkles on your cheeks. And in case by chance you tend to embrace it which again is a very possibility all you tend to do is ignore yet again.
Ignorance is bliss this say, ignorant is surely at bliss, usually; however the ignored is usually screaming and screeching silently. The other day as I stood in front of the mirror I saw a lot of things in my reflection which I didn't want to see. Like, a couple of white hair on my head, deep dark circle and the marks of those wounds which I have been pretending to ignore. I am no artist or perfectionist. I have my own flaws which I pretend to be okay with.
It is in such times you start cursing the colour and the mirror, for showing you what you want to ignore. Obviously, colour and the mirror aren't as joyous as your salary cheque but nonetheless are equally essential.
It's laughable how our very own reflection tends to demoralise us every damn day. The colours which our soul wants to show are the ones which we want to hide. To keep it simple let's just say self and the employed self are two very different people. Employed self believes ignorance is bliss whereas Self has always suffered because of the pain that ignorance brings along!

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